I am a romantic skeptic. I don't believe it exists. At least not in the way that Hollywood and novels would have you think it does. I believe that the stories we watch and read were thought up by some fanciful mind and represent not reality but some persons full on delusions of grandeur. In reality people are much to driven and controlled by selfishness and insecurities for that kind of romance to really exist. And watching and reading such stories only causes us to find dissatisfaction with the perfectly fine relationships we do have. It makes girls set unattainable demands upon the poor men who have taken the risk of attempting to satisfy their romantic needs. Further it drives away possible suitors from ever taking the risk to be that man.
No, I do not enjoy entertaining myself with these media, save for the laugh I receive at their complete off baseness. I will not dilute my head with these lies. I will not hope for the unattainable. I am a realist. And I believe in practical romance. Messy, challenging relationships, full of simple actions that we rarely are able to get out of our own way to notice and give gratitude for.
The only love story I will say I thoroughly enjoy would be that of Elizabeth Bennett and Mr. Darcy in Pride and Prejudice. People are always judging each other over only a moment’s acquaintance and assuming that first impression is reason enough to characterize the individual forever. The person’s appearance, voice, or small facial gesture is enough for you to know their entire personality… whether they are shy, outgoing, friendly, rude, materialistic, sophisticated… etc. And to challenge this assumption, the judged must spend hours upon hours proving your conjecture wrong before you will concede and alter your presumption accordingly.
This is all assuming the judged party hasn’t taken offense or tired of disproving the inaccurate assumption and is no longer in your circle of contacts. See that is where Jane Austin and I part ways. I would like to hope that Mr. Darcy would have been faithful to his affections for Elizabeth. However my experience in life has taught me that in reality, by the time that Elizabeth was able to finally get around herself to see him for who he truly was, he would have already moved on to Ms. Rebecca Lovegood down the lane.
Don’t think me a person devoid of romance though. I find my life is full of romance. By having absolutely no expectation that anyone will deliver such affections, I am more often than not surprised to find little tidbits of warm fuzzies in every day. In rejecting the expectation of a display of opulence, I open myself to noticing vast numbers of acts of altruism. They are in the stranger that holds the door open for you. In the friend that phones just to see how your day was. The person that pays for your coffee just because. I am romanced every day by friends and strangers alike.
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